This letter came to me while connecting the dots after a counseling session I had about two years ago. Reparenting yourself  became a journey I eventually learned to walk through, though not without stumbling along the way.

Because in the end, I finally met my younger self. The fragile part of me that had been hiding behind the words “self-love.” And I realized that what I once called self-love was, in many ways, actually a toxic relationship within myself.

I used to think I loved myself enough. But the truth was, I was someone who constantly put herself second after. Even though “Put Yourself First” was written in big letters on my bedroom board. Even though “Love Yourself First” had become the wallpaper on my phone. I was still the person who stepped back, compromised, and made myself smaller so other people could look bigger.

And I kept wondering: How could someone who claims to practice self-love continue abandoning herself so easily?

Eventually, I decided to book an appointment with a Counselor. Because journaling no longer felt relieving. And new perspectives no longer seemed helping.

Then I realized something. For years, I had been treating myself the way ‘my adult version of me’ wanted to be treated. But the one who was hurting was actually little Mia (My inner child).

Maybe adult Mia should have known better. Maybe she should have learned how little Mia truly wanted to be loved. No wonder journaling and logic sometimes stopped working whenever I felt overwhelmed. Because they weren’t what my inner child needed.

There were parts of my inner child that were still waiting to be seen. Parts that never felt emotionally safe. Parts that never learned how to regulate or validate difficult feelings. Parts that still longed to be celebrated for small victories, like getting good grades or winning a competition, but never really knew who to share that pride with.

And that’s when I understood that reparenting yourself isn’t only about becoming a good parent for your future kids. It’s also about becoming a kind, safe, and loving adult for the inner child who still lives within you today.

Because the truth is, we’re never really alone. Inside us, there are always two selves walking side by side: The person we are today. And the younger version of us who was once hurt.

And caring for who we used to be…

is one of the deepest acts of love we can offer to who we are now.

Perhaps reparenting isn’t about fixing who we were. Perhaps it’s about finally becoming the safe place we once spent years looking for in other people.